A shot at a lap dance with Tila Tequila

Just based on the previews, this is the episode I've been waiting for ... and it was mostly disappointing, much like the last episode. Still, queer visibility for the win!

Tila headed home with the four remaining deluded nutbags, and I learned that even reality show contestants have semi-normal families.

Amanda:

- is an Amazon who towers approximately 800 feet above everything, including small buildings.

- has a surprisingly sweet mom and dad who managed to brush off all of the "I'm SO gonna shock you" stuff that Tila did.

- lives on beachfront property and has some kind of shady, drug-addicted past. Shocker.

Ryan:

- is a douchebag with matching douchebag friends and douchebag car.

- has an uber-conservative, WASP family who didn't really seem to take well to the whole "bisexual girlfriend" news.

- has a kind of hot sister.

Bobby:

- inexplicably lives in rural, upstate New York.

- has a bitch mother.

- is probably going to win, despite both of those giant effing strikes against him.

Dani:

- is the proud granddaughter of possibly the raddest grandma EVER, who not only accepted a lap dance from Tila, but shed a few tears o' love over her really cool grandkid.

- has firehouse co-workers that are protective and sweet.

- breaks out what looks like a modified version of one those WNBA draft suits in the preview for the next episode. You know what I'm talking about? It's the open-necked shirt under the suit jacket that says, "Hi there! I'm on television getting drafted for a career in which I'll probably make about 35, 000 bucks a year. On ESPN! How much money do you make? Really? God, I probably could make more than that doing the thing that I could do with my degree. Anyway ... despite the fact that you've never seen me wearing anything but warmups, having my hair in any style but a ponytail or braids, or doing anything but slapping asses and being kind of butch, I'm still a straight, straight woman! The WNBA probably made me wear this so that I seem like a non-threatening sexual entity, but damn if I don't like looking like a dude in drag. Also, have you seen how much money we make when we play outside of the U.S.? "

So, someone gets sent home! Would you be surprised to learn that it's Ryan? Nah, didn't think so.

Next week: Mexico! WNBA suits! I'm not sure what else!

Bonus: This week's episode was filled with little awesome clips of M.I.A. in between commercials and such. Much better than last week's Alicia Keys-fest.