Dear Jodie Foster,

I wasn't that big of a fan of yours until I saw just how fantastically sassy you were in "Inside Man." That taunt ponytail, tailored suit and smugly smug mug were all it took to hook me in. This isn't to say that the movie was only OK. Then, "Flight Plan" made me see that other character you play: Frightened Woman with Child. Not as in, "with child, i.e. pregnant" but as in "Child is drug around by hand." You just get that whole fear thing down to a T: beady eyes, pursed lips, furrowed brow. I dig that about you. However.

I must say with "The Brave One" you entered new territory. The audience was laughing, laughing at how incredibly unbelievable the plot was and, also at how some of the people died. Even Girlfriend said, "This isn't a comedy, but I've never so many people laughing at a movie." It's not often that I get halfway through a movie and think to myself that watching the preview would have been sufficient, and sadly, more satisfying.

Terrence Howard completed the cast by acting as though he gave a damn as a detective. The only saving grace during the whole debacle was Nicky Katt, who played Howard's partner. And not that kind of partner, because maybe then, the movie would have gone from unwatchable to decent.

So you, Jodie Foster, owe me two hours of my life back. Two hours that I'll never get back. Two hours I could have spent shoe shopping. Or, at the very least, trolling the Internet for shoes. And purses. And pretty necklaces. But now I'm getting off track.

In any event, I hope the next script that lands on your desk has some other sort of character than the ones you've been picking to play. I hope.